Wednesday, January 05, 2011

The Crime Of Neglect

Ah bloggie, how I have neglected you. Of all the promises and best of intentions I fail to maintain the momentum.

However I have new vigour. No, that is a horrid word that brings connotations of old men for some reason.

I have neglected everything. In fact for the past few weeks, along with the hustle and bustle of the "festive" season everything has had an air of fug over it. I no longer create, I vegetate. Yes, that is an apt description. I really should put more effort into things but instead I feel so tired I have barely the energy to keep up - and even in that I'm not successful.

I worry sometimes that the illness will come back, just as we are getting on our way. But the tiredness can be explain by lack of sleep and the truth that I simply have too much to do and no one to share the burden with.

Too late I realised that some people do not change and that living with someone who seemed to have changed to the point of being likeable throws light on to that character. And shadows can't hide in the light. That is what I am most disappointed with and it weighs heavily. Especially when you cannot openly talk about it. This is not a healthy way to live.

So, choices - bitch about it or do something about it.

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